Hello there!!! I thought it was about time I pop in a give a proper update on what’s been going on with me. Any posts that have gone live during the latter part of April and all of March were pre-scheduled back in February, as I was preparing for the birth of my daughter that was scheduled for this week!
Life plays funny tricks on you and really tests you I think. I believe that my faith was tested….. On February 5th, for no particular reason, I stopped by a pharmacy to have my blood pressure checked. I was shocked when the reading was high. We are talking 160/90 high. I went to two other places to have my pressure rechecked just to be sure. I called my OB, who told me to go to the hospital…. After a few tests, they admitted me and told me I would be there until I delivered, roughly 4 1/2 more weeks. I was at the beginning phases of pre-eclampsia and they wanted to monitor me carefully. My pressures never regulated. They were up and down, up and down… My blood work was totally fine. But my urine samples showed a HIGH amount of protein (another sign of pre-eclampsia)… In two days, it went from 1800 to 8000. They thought because of the rapid increase there must have been something wrong with the lab results, so they re-ordered the test… Halfway thru it, they took my pressure and it was the highest it had ever been. 190/100 and something…. 2 minutes later they were rolling in my door with the stretcher stating that I would be delivering my daughter that very night, at 33 weeks and 6 days….
You can only imagine how afraid I was… All kinds of things were running thru my mind. Would she be ok? How much would she weigh? Would she breathe on her own? Would there be any issues with her? Would I be ok? At 10:45PM on February 16th, we welcomed Lily Kate Beard to this world… Because of the pre-eclampsia, I couldn’t see her for 24 hours due to the 24 magnesium drip they administered to avoid seizures. But my husband brought me pictures of her on his phone. She was gorgeous. A full head of hair… Just beautiful. I was finally able to meet her around 10PM the following day…. I don’t remember much of several days after delivery due to the medications, but I remember seeing her for the first time. I had mixed emotions. Joy because our daughter was here, the daughter we struggled so hard for all those years. The daughter the good Lord finally blessed us with…. And then guilt. Guilt that I couldn’t get control of my body to carry her longer so she wouldn’t have been born so premature, so little….. It took a while for the emotions to die down. Our precious daughter spent 16 days in the NICU… 16 LONG days…. I was in the hospital for 5 of those days, as my pressure was not regulating. But when I was released, my family drove me up there everyday where I would spend long hours with my daughter…. It was heartbreaking to leave her behind every day. Just heartbreaking. But I knew that was the best place for her. Miraculously, she never needed oxygen. Her lungs were developed! The only thing she needed was a feeding tube to help her eat.
On March 4th, she was able to come home. Finally, my son was able to meet his sister. I have never felt such joy when we walked in with her. He didn’t know she was coming home. His face. My face. The emotions we felt. Our family, FINALLY, was complete. I have kids. Not just a kid. KidS! We struggled for so long and endured so many heartaches and losses, and now, she is here! Our beautiful baby daughter is here to join her handsome precious brother. We couldn’t be more happy. She is growing every single day. She is becoming more alert every single day. All I can say is thank you. Thank you Jesus for blessing us with this miracle.
What if I hadn’t gone and had my pressure checked? I certainly wasn’t feeling any symptoms nor did I even think for one second that I was going to develop pre-eclampsia or have that high blood pressure reading. Something just said, “hey, there’s a Walgreens. Pop in and have your pressure checked” – So I did. My regular OB appointment wasn’t for another 8 days. So what if I hadn’t stopped in at Walgreens? I would venture to say things would have gone very, VERY differently.
Faith is a funny thing. And a hard thing to have… I know in the hospital, I had some really low moments. My pressure was continuing to climb even after I delivered. They put me on meds, and it was still climbing. I thought at one point I was going to die. I was going to leave my kids with no mom. I lost my faith. But look. Everything turned out ok. I am recovering. Lily is here and is getting stronger every day.
Having a premie is very different than having a full term… We learned so much. Different techniques. Different ways to feed her, hold her, burp her, etc….. Since she was born early, she might reach milestones later than full term babies.. Those are all things we will deal with as the time comes. For now, I am enjoying having her home. Even during those nighttime feedings when she doesn’t want to go back to sleep! 🙂